Friday 17 September 2010

Fans 'Panicking Their Balls off' at schedule news...

Grown men squealing like little girls has been the noise which has surrounded SCC HQ this afternoon. We haven't had any confirm news as of yet but brief sightings of the new SCC Captain Nick 'Cooey Sailor' Brooker and his President in crime Mat 'I think I'll be buying a new putter' Kinson, have only added rumour and specualtion to the gossip about SCC 2011.

As most of you know by now, it has not been a happy few months since the completion of SCC 2010. The once great Matthew Miller has been whittled to the toothpick of a man he once was after taking on the Guyton name, and further prostitution rumours have only deepened his wounds. His apparent 'sex for cash' arrangement with Ben Williams was sprayed across the red tops only a month ago, threatening the upcoming nuptials for Mr Miller. This, thankfully, did not prevent the marriage, but it did mean that Ben had to put his knob elsewhere .... Congratulations to Mrs Sally Williams, in her upcoming pregnancy.


We did try today to get some news out of the new SCC captain, but unfortunatly he refused to speak to reporters. That we can only assume is because he had mouth full of semen which he was saving for later on.

Former Pres and SCC 2006, 07, 09, 10 winner
Mr P Bramwell