The SCC: May 2013

Monday 20 May 2013

......Sponsorship Announcement....

As fate has decreed that its impossible for Mattkinson, Bumwell and Seds to be picked together in a team next year i can exclusively reveal that the 'Heroes to Zeroes' team members are currently negotiating individual mega deals for sponsorship at the 2014 Royal St David's spectacular.....

'I's are being dotted and 'T's are being crossed on a 'bountiful' deal with 'ManGo Juice' that will see the following logo 'splashed' across the team's clothing:

The SCC's party-goers extraordinaire refused to comment on the speculation, indeed for once their mouth's were firmly closed.....

More details as they become available...

Monday 13 May 2013

.....To Cut A Long Story Short..................Seddon in Spandau Ballet tribute act on Friday of SCC......

...... Can a captain really captain when he's capturing hearts playing "Gold"? Does he really think he's indestructible? Is he really always believing?

Breaking News .....

The SCC board woke up to the devastating news this morning that the stalwart of the SCC players Mr Chris 'Media Whore' Seddon will not be able to play at SCC '13.

As most people now know, Seddon likes to get about a bit. He can be often found in some far flung destination enticing the local homosexuals by seductively blowing his trumpet in various tight leiderhosen,

Being the new 'face of Dior'

Or, causing him to miss this year's SCC, regrouping with ABBA at the Eurovision finals.

Never one to miss the opportunity to blow his metal appendage in public, Seddon had this to say, "It was obviously a very difficult decision to make, I hope the boys will understand. When ABBA approached me I knew it would be bad news for the SCC, but one look at the spandex which they suggested I wear and I was sold."

Retirement of a Legend

In further news it is reported that Si 'Who?' Porter will be retiring his Donnay Slammer after 26 years of faithful service and loyalty. Simon had this to say to the media...

"I have absolutely no script in my mind. I'm just going to ramble on and hope I get to the core of what this golf club has meant to me. This is a thank you to Donnay. Not just the directors, not just the medical staff, the coaching staff, the other SCC players and supporters. It's all of you. This has been the most fantastic experience of my life. Thank you."

"I have been very fortunate that I've been able to play with this club at many special golf clubs throughout Wales. Although I have never held the SCC trophy it has helped me win the wooden spoon many times in fantastic fashion."

"My retirement from Donnay does mean the end of my life with this club. I'll now be able to enjoy looking for my ball at least another 15 yards further from the tee, rather than suffer with the embarrassment of having to search for it just short of the ladies tee's. But, if you think about it, those duck-hooks, the slices, even the air shots are all part of this great Donnay Slammer ... so thank you for that."

"I'd also like to remind you that when we had bad times with the club, all the staff stood by me, all the SCC players stood by me. Your job now is to stand by my new club selection.

"Before I start blubbing, I just want to speak to Chris Seddon who will be missing this years event. He is unbelievable. One of the greatest players we've ever had and ever will ever.

"I also want to wish Matt Miller a speedy recovery to form and return to the golf course.

"I wish the SCC players every success in the future You know how good you are, you know the clubs you're playing with and you know what it means to everyone here. Don't ever let yourselves down. The expectation is always there."

Wise words, from a wise man.

Pete

Sunday 12 May 2013

Are these really appropriate antics for a senior SCC'er?

Surely preparation for as seminal an event in the sporting calendar as the Second City Challenge should take a more serious form than dressing up in a Bayern Munich kit and getting shedded...

Also Ben how did you get that 'Jim'll Fix It' medal?

Friday 10 May 2013

The results are in! The Official SCC Mascot 2013 is....

In previous years, the official SCC Mascot has had something of a low-key role.

So low-key, in fact, you would be forgiven for missing it completely. Or forgiven for thinking it was Pete Bramwell and letting him win was part of the deal...

But not this year.

This year, the SCC Mascot has been determined by public vote for the first time. Not an X-factor style, rigged-by-the-producers telephone vote. This competition has, we are pleased to announce, been determined by secret ballot of the residents of Llandudno.

It gives me great pleasure to announce the results, in reverse order.

Third place – Shaun the Sheep

Shaun was a promising contender and popular among the residents of Llandudno.

Alas, his lack of sporting ability and tendency to munch through the golf courses of North Wales (Ffestiniog Golf Club is a favourite) saw him edged into third place.

Second place – Katherine Jenkins

She's hot. She's Welsh. She runs marathons for charity.

And, she tells us, she has a soft spot for the SCC.

"I know you've changed the format in recent years," she said recently, "and I like the new format, don't get me wrong.

But I really used to like watching Team Liverpool. They were crowd pleasers, you know?

And of course they are well lush."

First place – wait for it....

Yes, you've guessed it....

Yes, it's you Blobby! Blobby, Blobby, Blobby!

He's done it again. Take That Katherine Jenkins.

He likes golf.

He loves the SCC.

And he has a real affinity with the new format...

See you next weekend, for.... "Getting Blobby"

Tuesday 7 May 2013

Glass balls at the ready...

With the tension building and the bunting being prepared, focus of late has been drawn the SCC's annual sweepstake.

As avid supporters of the SCC will know, it is a tradition that each year a famous celebrity will pop their clogs. As this is almost a certainty, there is normally a brief sweep within the SCC players to guess who the unfortunate recipient will be. In a strange twist to this years proceedings the rules have been altered due to Operation Yewtree throwing up so many family favourite celebrities to be banged up for historical kiddy fiddling.

This years sweep sees the players not only guessing who will kick the bucket but also who will be arrested, favourites so far are:

Tarrant – 5/1
Brucey – 10/1
Barrymore – 2/1
Blackburn – 4/1
Cilla – 20/1
Cliff – 16/1

On other issues, the ex Team Manchester pairing of Guyton and Bumwell host their annual 2 rounds of 9 at Royal Hale tonight in preparation for the big event next week, Guyton had this to say, "I always like coming to play Royal Hale, the way it plays so differently on each round of 9 really tests a golfers focus and endurance. I like to think that I am ready for the SCC each year, but Royal Hale always exploits my weaknesses. The tricky 290 yard 8th (17th) hole always swallows up a few balls when I launch up a nice hanging high fade. I just hope the North Wales golf club can live up to the comparison of this nasty little 9-holer."

SCC History

The idea of an annual golfing challenge between Birmingham and Manchester was first proposed at some time over the Christmas of 2005. Since that time, two-ball teams have fought over a gruelling weekend for the honour of calling their city ‘Britain’s Second City’.

Royal Nefyn Golf Course in North Wales hosted the first competition over the Easter of 2006.

The representatives of Birmingham, Nicholas Brooker and Benjamin Williams fought to the last hole of an intense weekend of golf, over three rounds, only to succumb to a world-class put on the final hole from Peter Bramwell, representing Manchester. Neil Guyton, the other member of the Manchester pairing carded an estimated two under par for the final round to help the Mancunians to the title of Britain’s Second City, 2006.

The success of the competition in its fledgling year was enough to generate interest from other cities around the country believing they can stake a claim to the title of Britain’s Second City.

The competition moved to Royal St Davids in 2007 and witnessed a swelling in competitor numbers with the introduction of groups from Liverpool and Nottingham. Mathew Atkinson playing for Liverpool and Simon Porter and Dominic Williams playing for Nottingham were unable to mount any sort of a challenge in the new format competition. Manchester retained their crown after another tense final hole in which Nottingham could have won either the title or wooden spoon. They ended up with the latter. Birminghams challenge was dealt a cruel blow as Ben Williams was struck down by tonsilitus.

SCC2008 was hosted by Averdovey over a cold and windy April weekend. For the first time, competitor numbers were at capacity with the addition of Chris Seddon to the Liverpool team. As seems to be the tradition with the competition, the title went to the last hole where Birmingham held their nerve against a rejuvinated Nottingham pairing. Liverpool collected the wooden spoon.

SCC2009 tooks the competitors to South Wales and the Pennard Golf Club, near Swansea. With a surge of golf club membership over the summer, the event promised to dish up golf of an even higher quality than had been witnessed so far. However, the extreme challenge presented by Pennard reduced the competetors to wrecks of the former golfers they once were! Manchester secured their 3rd title at the 16th hole of the final round against a highly competitive Team Liverpool. Birmingham narrowly beat Liverpool to second place with a final round victory over the wooden spoon winners Nottingham.

2010 was a big year for the SCC. The 5th year anniversary competition saw the teams take on a the new challenge of Tenby Golf Course. In a break with tradition, this years captain was elected from outside of the original foursome and all agreed than Matkinson did an excellent job. Neil Guytons absence from the Team Manchester line up did little to change the recent trend. Pet Bumwell, partnered by Matt Miller, chalked up another victory on the excellent Tenby track. The only thing counting against the course was the huge journies faced by all.

2011 saw Nick take up the captaincy reigns. The SCC went back to it's roots and introduced Nottingham and Liverpool to the wonders of the old course at Neffyn.

2012 is a seminal year in the history of the competition. The format and name were both changed in order to expand the number of competitors to 9. The Second City Challenge from this point on became simply The SCC. The new competition now pitches 3 3-ball teams against each other, drawn according to handicap this year, but in future years based upon performance in the previous years competition. The first test of the new competition was held at Pyle and Kenfig. 'Getting blobby' was born amidst some high scoring as a result of the usual SCC weather.

2013 took The SCC to North Wales Golf Club, Llandudno in the hope of providing a slightly less harsh golfing test for the players. The rain and wind stayed away for the most part and scores were must improved. An early target for best individual score was set by B Williams of 46 points (off a handicap of 20).