The SCC: January 2010

Thursday 28 January 2010

SCC venue confirmed - 9/10 July 2010

Absolutely exclusive to secondcitychallenge.blogspot.com!

The blog announcement we've all been waiting for!

Amidst raucous scenes at UKPGA Headquarters this morning, we caught up briefly with 2010 Captain, Matkinson, to ask him a few questions as to this year's venue.

We also caught up with a long-standing SCC fan (shown above, posing by links-type scenery).

Reporter: "Are you pleased Mr Captain that the deal is now in the bag."

El Capitan: "Yes thanks, ecstatic. They never thought I had it in me those boys. They thought my secretary was doing it all. Well...I'll show them. I've actually gone and booked a golf course!!"

Reporter: "Well done. It's a good one too, if I may say so. One of Wales' premier links tracks."

El Capitan: "Yes, well, I did think about something different this year. Something easier, basically, with less sand and rough. But we're coming back for more punishment! Links golf's where it's at, I'd say."

Reporter: "Quite. And of course, we'll be surrounded by an area of oustanding natural beauty. It's nice to see there were no backhanders involved again this year."

El Capitan: "What?!... Who mentioned backhanders?... I didn't mention them. Obviously there will be sponsorship contracts won and lost on the back of this decision, but I only have the interests of the game at heart, you understand that?..."

... Matkinson was at this stage thrust into a blacked-out Range Rover by two members of his security entourage, and driven away at speed.

One fan had this to say on this year's venue: "Nice. I loves the Pamela Andersons. "

But at least, here at SCCblogspot.com, we can rest assured that another mouthwatering tournament is in prospect. When the players tee off on the morning of Friday 9 July 2010, looking out over Carmarthen Bay, we'll be with them every step, top, slice and duff of the way. Follow all the action here, at secondcitychallenge.blogspot.com.....

Friday 22 January 2010

What's all the fuss about? It's only a baby...

Team Birmingham have reacted with surprise to the news that Neil "The Duck" Gayton has withdrawn fro SCC2010 due the imminent arrival of a little baby.

It is a well known fact that Nick "The Daddy" Brooker gave birth on a golf course in 2004 whist expanding the Birmingham brand overseas. The fact that he continued the round and carded a respectable +2 has made him something of a cult hero on the island ever since.

Wednesday 20 January 2010

TBC - C'ed

SCC followers awoke this morning to the news they had all been waiting to hear, Matthew Miller, 72, has confirmed that Miss E Guyton, 27, will let him play in SCC 2010.

"I'm not happy about it," said Neil and Emily in unison, "I'm not happy about it at all. This sort of thing will not be tolerated once we are wed, hang on .... (shouting upstairs) ... Matthew, have you cleaned behind your ears yet? Put some f***ing clothes on, you f***ing layabout .... Sorry, where was I? Yes, I'm not happy with this, I'm even thinking of coming along just to keep my eyes on him. I've heard about Peter's length and I'm very worried."

Neil was also visually distressed and commented, "No comment."

So, it is with great pleasure that I now can announce my newest member to Team Manchester for 2010, Mr Matthew "In The Hole" Miller.

Mr Pres

Tuesday 19 January 2010

Breaking News... Neil Pulls Out After Finding Penis

As most of you may be aware, Team Manchester has been halved from two great golfers, to just one and a half great golfers. The aforementioned half, Mr Neil 'Yes It Works' Guyton, has been getting his end away and managed to produce a sprog. Not even cries from Massive C Seddon of, "Stop Nobbin' Around", could not prevent this from happening.

So it brings me with great pleasure to welcome Mr Matthew Miller (65), to the SCC for 2010 (Still TBC). I'm sure that we will welcome Matthew with open arms and erect penis's into the SCC fold.

Matthew, born 7th January 1935, was delighted when he heard the news. "I just can't believe it," said the radpidly aging southerner, "I have to keep pinching my nipples, just to make sure it's not a dream. I never knew that dropping out of Manchester Polytechnic in 1992 would ever come around to this. I know that I have a small role to play, as Neil was just the supporting act, and even though I will try my best, it will be hard to over-shadow the presence that is Mr Peter 'Length' Bramwell."

Wise words, by an less than average golfer, I'm sure you'll agree.

Mr President

Sunday 10 January 2010

Team Liverpool Rule Themselves out of SCC 2010 Race

Team Liverpool pairing, Captain Mattkinson and Christopher Seddon were recently quizzed about their chances at SCC 2010. The pair were quick to write off their chances and when asked if they would pose for SCC Blogspot.com, they adopted a stance highlighting both their golfing prowess and their general likeability factor. Mattkinson stated "Team Liverpool are talked about every year as having an outside chance of finishing within the top 3, however Chris and I are more realistic than that. We know that we are both Losers (as highlighted in the attached image) and that our golfing talent is less than substandard, however we do enjoy taking part in the tournament as we get to spend time with the likes of 'Long shlong' Dom Williams, Neil 'high fade' Gayton and Nick 'I have found my penis' Brooker which in itself is a huge honour.

Pet Bumwell of a posh area outside of Manchester had a different take on the reported photograph. Bumwell went on record stating that the scouse pairing were actually demonstrating that they are actually as dim as they look and conforming to the stereotype that all scousers (even fake ones) are stupid. It is Bumwell's opinion that the pairing were actually describing themselves as a brace of massive C's, but they unfortunately spelled out L's for losers which Bumwell was quick to highlight is also actually the case!

2010 should prove to be another competitive year within the greatest golfing tournament the planet has ever seen, it is fair to say that anyone of the four teams could win it, however the likely outcome is that one of the sides from the East Midlands will probably be victorious for the first time!

Wednesday 6 January 2010

Scandle in the highest form...

Dear Members of the Honourable SCC,

It is with great sadness is that I bring you this news. It has been tearing me apart inside but I cannot play down the rumours any longer.

You may have heard in the news and the media that photographs of "inter-team-inter-course" have been taken. I feel that is my duty that I let you know and see them before general release to the public (see below).

Mr Willams and Mr Matkinson, my apologies.

I know that if we really try, we can all get through this together.

Your Friend

Mr President

SCC History

The idea of an annual golfing challenge between Birmingham and Manchester was first proposed at some time over the Christmas of 2005. Since that time, two-ball teams have fought over a gruelling weekend for the honour of calling their city ‘Britain’s Second City’.

Royal Nefyn Golf Course in North Wales hosted the first competition over the Easter of 2006.

The representatives of Birmingham, Nicholas Brooker and Benjamin Williams fought to the last hole of an intense weekend of golf, over three rounds, only to succumb to a world-class put on the final hole from Peter Bramwell, representing Manchester. Neil Guyton, the other member of the Manchester pairing carded an estimated two under par for the final round to help the Mancunians to the title of Britain’s Second City, 2006.

The success of the competition in its fledgling year was enough to generate interest from other cities around the country believing they can stake a claim to the title of Britain’s Second City.

The competition moved to Royal St Davids in 2007 and witnessed a swelling in competitor numbers with the introduction of groups from Liverpool and Nottingham. Mathew Atkinson playing for Liverpool and Simon Porter and Dominic Williams playing for Nottingham were unable to mount any sort of a challenge in the new format competition. Manchester retained their crown after another tense final hole in which Nottingham could have won either the title or wooden spoon. They ended up with the latter. Birminghams challenge was dealt a cruel blow as Ben Williams was struck down by tonsilitus.

SCC2008 was hosted by Averdovey over a cold and windy April weekend. For the first time, competitor numbers were at capacity with the addition of Chris Seddon to the Liverpool team. As seems to be the tradition with the competition, the title went to the last hole where Birmingham held their nerve against a rejuvinated Nottingham pairing. Liverpool collected the wooden spoon.

SCC2009 tooks the competitors to South Wales and the Pennard Golf Club, near Swansea. With a surge of golf club membership over the summer, the event promised to dish up golf of an even higher quality than had been witnessed so far. However, the extreme challenge presented by Pennard reduced the competetors to wrecks of the former golfers they once were! Manchester secured their 3rd title at the 16th hole of the final round against a highly competitive Team Liverpool. Birmingham narrowly beat Liverpool to second place with a final round victory over the wooden spoon winners Nottingham.

2010 was a big year for the SCC. The 5th year anniversary competition saw the teams take on a the new challenge of Tenby Golf Course. In a break with tradition, this years captain was elected from outside of the original foursome and all agreed than Matkinson did an excellent job. Neil Guytons absence from the Team Manchester line up did little to change the recent trend. Pet Bumwell, partnered by Matt Miller, chalked up another victory on the excellent Tenby track. The only thing counting against the course was the huge journies faced by all.

2011 saw Nick take up the captaincy reigns. The SCC went back to it's roots and introduced Nottingham and Liverpool to the wonders of the old course at Neffyn.

2012 is a seminal year in the history of the competition. The format and name were both changed in order to expand the number of competitors to 9. The Second City Challenge from this point on became simply The SCC. The new competition now pitches 3 3-ball teams against each other, drawn according to handicap this year, but in future years based upon performance in the previous years competition. The first test of the new competition was held at Pyle and Kenfig. 'Getting blobby' was born amidst some high scoring as a result of the usual SCC weather.

2013 took The SCC to North Wales Golf Club, Llandudno in the hope of providing a slightly less harsh golfing test for the players. The rain and wind stayed away for the most part and scores were must improved. An early target for best individual score was set by B Williams of 46 points (off a handicap of 20).